I saw this today and just loved it. Every woman should see this video.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
The Truth About Missions and Motherhood
Last night at about midnight I was awakened by Nayeli screaming from her crib. I found her feverish, and as I was just about
to give her some Motrin and nurse her back to sleep, I felt
a sickening splash on my face and shoulder. A quick flick of the light
switch revealed last night's dinner on my cheek and shirt. Ugh.
Thankfully (insert sarcastic tone here) I have a husband who is a complete zombie when awakened in the middle of the night (remember how at 1:30 am he was driving to the hospital going 5mph under the speed limit while I was having contractions every 2 minutes?). However, in Ben's defense, he was able to get a grasp of reality long enough to hold the screaming Nayeli while I cleaned up myself and changed her. He then retreated back to our bedroom while I rocked our sick girl. Before sunrise I had changed my shirt three times. Needless to say, it was a long night.
By this morning, I had drafted an idea in my head on how to prepare those who are contemplating parenthood. I'd like to introduce it by way of an analogy. I'll call it the Sister Missionary analogy.
Lately, numerous LDS girls are going on missions and I think it's amazing. But for me, there's a caveat. Everyone tells them, "Oh it's wonderful! It'll be the best 18 months of your life! You're going to love it!" And they're right. It is all those things and more. But where is the person who sits each one down and says, "We need to have a chat. Has anyone told you how hard this is going to be? Has anyone mentioned that there will be MULTIPLE TIMES that you will wonder why in the world you went on a mission? That you will give anything for a plane ticket home?"
For me, it was my sister Christina. She served in the Dominican Republic in the 1990's. To say she had a taxing mission would be putting it mildly. She bathed from a bucket and never had a shower, was constantly battling parasites, lost a large portion of her hair, and had companions who hated and refused to speak to her. She even told me that at one point she prayed she would break her leg so she could be sent home.
Like the others I've described, she told me about the good of the mission. But because she took time to tell me about the bad, it helped me a lot. I knew it would be great, while at the same time knowing that it would be really really hard. And I did encounter a lot that tested me to my max, physically and emotionally. But I always had Tina's voice in my head saying, "It's okay. It's normal for it to be hard. It will be worth it".
Just for fun, here are a few photos of a few things that tested me physically (as to not incriminate former companions, investigators, or members, I will not be posting pictures of the things that emotionally taxed me :) ).
Then I realized that it doesn't matter. It wouldn't have diminished my desire to be a mother. Just like my sister's talk never lessened my desire to be a missionary. In fact, last night, after the mess was cleaned up and I held my daughter snuggled against my chest, I felt there was no where else I'd rather be.
*Note: My example is specific to sister missionaries because in my opinion, the mission is an entirely different battle for the sisters than the Elders. Both face similar problems in the mission, but my observation has been that the sisters deal with the stress and difficulties in the mission in a different way than the Elders. And, of course, I was never an Elder so I can't speak for what helps prepare them for a mission. I am just speaking from my own observations and experiences.
Thankfully (insert sarcastic tone here) I have a husband who is a complete zombie when awakened in the middle of the night (remember how at 1:30 am he was driving to the hospital going 5mph under the speed limit while I was having contractions every 2 minutes?). However, in Ben's defense, he was able to get a grasp of reality long enough to hold the screaming Nayeli while I cleaned up myself and changed her. He then retreated back to our bedroom while I rocked our sick girl. Before sunrise I had changed my shirt three times. Needless to say, it was a long night.
By this morning, I had drafted an idea in my head on how to prepare those who are contemplating parenthood. I'd like to introduce it by way of an analogy. I'll call it the Sister Missionary analogy.
Lately, numerous LDS girls are going on missions and I think it's amazing. But for me, there's a caveat. Everyone tells them, "Oh it's wonderful! It'll be the best 18 months of your life! You're going to love it!" And they're right. It is all those things and more. But where is the person who sits each one down and says, "We need to have a chat. Has anyone told you how hard this is going to be? Has anyone mentioned that there will be MULTIPLE TIMES that you will wonder why in the world you went on a mission? That you will give anything for a plane ticket home?"
For me, it was my sister Christina. She served in the Dominican Republic in the 1990's. To say she had a taxing mission would be putting it mildly. She bathed from a bucket and never had a shower, was constantly battling parasites, lost a large portion of her hair, and had companions who hated and refused to speak to her. She even told me that at one point she prayed she would break her leg so she could be sent home.
Like the others I've described, she told me about the good of the mission. But because she took time to tell me about the bad, it helped me a lot. I knew it would be great, while at the same time knowing that it would be really really hard. And I did encounter a lot that tested me to my max, physically and emotionally. But I always had Tina's voice in my head saying, "It's okay. It's normal for it to be hard. It will be worth it".
Just for fun, here are a few photos of a few things that tested me physically (as to not incriminate former companions, investigators, or members, I will not be posting pictures of the things that emotionally taxed me :) ).
Giant cockroaches
The ants and mosquitoes were vicious. My legs were covered with bites like this my entire mission and I had scars for a year or two after. Also, please marvel at my amazing tan lines from my shoes.
Washing my clothes by hand in the shower (thankfully I did have a shower in all my areas).
This typically took almost all of our preparation day.
This typically took almost all of our preparation day.
The lizard I had to chase out of the house with a broom
The spider I killed in our house. My nametag is on the ground to show it's size.
It jumped at me as I went to spray it. Note the huge pincers on the front of it's head.
But back to my idea. What if we apply the "chat" I received before my mission to motherhood? Wouldn't it be nice if a seasoned mom sat down with each girl who was considering motherhood and said, "We need to have a chat. Has anyone told you how hard this is going to
be? Has anyone mentioned that there will be MULTIPLE TIMES that you will
wonder why in the world you became a mother? That you will give anything for a plane ticket to Hawaii or anywhere else for that matter?"
It would be even more effective if the seasoned mothers were wearing shirts with spit up on them or pants with the remains of a blow-out on the thigh. And then, when times got hard for the new mom, she could remember the words of the seasoned mother saying, "It's okay. It's normal for it to be hard. It will be worth it".
Initially, when I woke this morning, I felt robbed. Where was the person that could have told me I would be awakened in the middle of the night only to be vomited on? Where was the seasoned mother who would let me know what it was really going to be like?
Initially, when I woke this morning, I felt robbed. Where was the person that could have told me I would be awakened in the middle of the night only to be vomited on? Where was the seasoned mother who would let me know what it was really going to be like?
Then I realized that it doesn't matter. It wouldn't have diminished my desire to be a mother. Just like my sister's talk never lessened my desire to be a missionary. In fact, last night, after the mess was cleaned up and I held my daughter snuggled against my chest, I felt there was no where else I'd rather be.
In both the mission and motherhood, the sweet greatly outweighs the trial. The sweet is what keeps you going. There is nothing harder, but there is also nothing better.
*Note: My example is specific to sister missionaries because in my opinion, the mission is an entirely different battle for the sisters than the Elders. Both face similar problems in the mission, but my observation has been that the sisters deal with the stress and difficulties in the mission in a different way than the Elders. And, of course, I was never an Elder so I can't speak for what helps prepare them for a mission. I am just speaking from my own observations and experiences.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Nayeli's First Birthday & Easter
We've been celebrating Nayeli's first birthday for weeks now. Last Friday Ben had the day off work so we went to the Living Planet Aquarium in Sandy. Nayeli wasn't really into the fish, but she liked the otters and penguins. It was a great place for somewhere as land-locked as Utah.
I'm pleased to announce that I got both a nurse shark and the sea turtle in this shot
Then last Saturday we had a combined birthday party with Nayeli and Ben's little sister Chelsea. We gave Nayeli a cupcake to let her dig into...
however she daintily ate it and hardly made a mess at all.
That wasn't exactly what I was going for :) I wanted some mess pictures!
Opening gifts with Grandma Jane
Helping with gift opening. I love her chubby cheeks in this picture.
Of course my mom went all out on the table decor. It was beautiful. And this was only the adult table. There were also two other kids tables decorated equally as beautiful.
Each place was even complete with a nametag
I made a banner of 12 months of Nayeli. Each picture was from a month of her life.
My amazing and hilarious sister Julia. Oh yeah, and there's a banner in this picture too :)
One year old and as cute as ever
We gave her a piece of strawberry pie complete with whipped creme.
A recipe for a mess? Perfect.
I think she likes it
Sometimes when she's eating in a high chair, she sticks her foot up like this and relaxes.
We call it her mob-boss pose.
She ate the entire piece of pie, no problem. This kid LOVES to eat.
The cherry on top for the night was found when I lifted Nayeli out of her high chair to put her in the tub. Unbeknownst to us, she had had a major blow-out while enjoying her strawberry pie. Thank heavens she was headed for the bath anyway. And yes we took some pictures as we laughed, but I'll spare you. We'll save those photos to show her first date.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
One year later...
Today our sweet Nayeli is a year old. I can't believe it has already been a year. I don't realize how much she's grown and changed until I look at pictures.
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Birth
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4 months
(I love this precious picture that I just got this week.
It was taken at my dear friend Cassidy's wedding)
8 months
12 months
Being a mother has by far been the hardest thing I've ever done... but also the most rewarding. Nayeli has made my world brighter, better, and more beautiful.
We love you Nayeli girl. Happy Birthday!
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
14 Fundamentals to Remember
This morning, as I read the news, I became a bit discouraged by some of the current events taking place nationwide. With so much confusion, I sometimes feel confused myself and question what I believe and why.
Then I remembered this talk. It was given by Ezra Taft Benson when he was a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. It is entitled, "Fourteen Fundamentals in Following the Prophet". Although it was given over 30 years ago, it is a message that is as applicable today as it was then. I have listed them as they are given in the talk, although he expounds on each one wonderfully.
FOURTEEN FUNDAMENTALS IN FOLLOWING THE PROPHET
Third: The living prophet is more important to us than a dead prophet.
Fourth: The prophet will never lead the Church astray.
Fifth: The prophet is not required to have any particular earthly training or diplomas to speak on any subject or act on any matter at any time.
Sixth: The prophet does not have to say “Thus saith the Lord” to give us scripture.
Seventh: The prophet tells us what we need to know, not always what we want to know.
Eighth: The Prophet is not limited by men’s reasoning. (This was the one I needed the most this morning so I thought I'd include what President Benson put after it).
Ninth: The prophet can receive revelation on any matter—temporal or spiritual.
Tenth: The prophet may well advise on civic matters.
Eleventh: The two groups who have the greatest difficulty in following the prophet are the proud who are learned and the proud who are rich.
Twelfth: The prophet will not necessarily be popular with the world or the worldly.
Thirteenth: The prophet and his counselors make up the First Presidency—The highest quorum in the Church.
Fourteenth: The prophet and the presidency—the living prophet and the First Presidency—follow them and be blessed—reject them and suffer.
Now I remember why I believe what I do. What a great reminder to me this morning that Jesus Christ has called a prophet in this day and age so that we can have a beacon of truth and reason. We need never feel discouraged, confused, or lost, no matter the circumstances that surround us.
Then I remembered this talk. It was given by Ezra Taft Benson when he was a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. It is entitled, "Fourteen Fundamentals in Following the Prophet". Although it was given over 30 years ago, it is a message that is as applicable today as it was then. I have listed them as they are given in the talk, although he expounds on each one wonderfully.
FOURTEEN FUNDAMENTALS IN FOLLOWING THE PROPHET
First: The prophet is the only man who speaks for the Lord in everything.
Second: The living prophet is more vital to us than the Standard Works.
Third: The living prophet is more important to us than a dead prophet.
Fourth: The prophet will never lead the Church astray.
Fifth: The prophet is not required to have any particular earthly training or diplomas to speak on any subject or act on any matter at any time.
Sixth: The prophet does not have to say “Thus saith the Lord” to give us scripture.
Seventh: The prophet tells us what we need to know, not always what we want to know.
Eighth: The Prophet is not limited by men’s reasoning. (This was the one I needed the most this morning so I thought I'd include what President Benson put after it).
"There
will be times when you will have to choose between the revelation of
God and reasoning of men—between the prophet and the professor.
Said the
Prophet Joseph Smith, “Whatever God requires is right, no matter what it is, although we may not see the reason thereof until long after the events transpire.” (Scrapbook of Mormon Literature, vol. 2, p. 173)."
then later...
" 'For
my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith
the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways
higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.' (Isa. 55:8–9.)"
Ninth: The prophet can receive revelation on any matter—temporal or spiritual.
Tenth: The prophet may well advise on civic matters.
Eleventh: The two groups who have the greatest difficulty in following the prophet are the proud who are learned and the proud who are rich.
Twelfth: The prophet will not necessarily be popular with the world or the worldly.
Thirteenth: The prophet and his counselors make up the First Presidency—The highest quorum in the Church.
Fourteenth: The prophet and the presidency—the living prophet and the First Presidency—follow them and be blessed—reject them and suffer.
Now I remember why I believe what I do. What a great reminder to me this morning that Jesus Christ has called a prophet in this day and age so that we can have a beacon of truth and reason. We need never feel discouraged, confused, or lost, no matter the circumstances that surround us.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Ben's Latest
This is Ben's latest video. It's for the new store opening at the company where he works.
When people ask what Ben does for work I like to say, "He makes videos for an online knife store". But Ben simply says, "I make YouTube knife videos". We're both right, but he's more right.
Often we get such a laugh out of the fact that videos like these made it possible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. It's ridiculous, but it pays the bills, and we can't complain about that.
When people ask what Ben does for work I like to say, "He makes videos for an online knife store". But Ben simply says, "I make YouTube knife videos". We're both right, but he's more right.
Often we get such a laugh out of the fact that videos like these made it possible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. It's ridiculous, but it pays the bills, and we can't complain about that.
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Flashback to February 2012
Note: Part of the purpose of this post is to remind myself, when pregnant in the future, that pregnancy does not last forever.
Last year at this time I was nine months pregnant and feeling oh-so-ready to have a baby. I was waking up every few hours at night to pee, sleeping uncomfortably with a pillow propped beneath both back and belly, and having Braxton Hicks contractions weekly. Not to mention the swollen feet and ankles I was getting from my twelve hour night-shifts in the ER.
And did I mention the envy I had for any woman who had recently given birth? Major jealousy...
But I wasn't the only one expecting. The ER was full of pregnant women. I was the furthest along, then the others followed close behind. A year ago this month we had a baby shower to celebrate.
And today, a year later, we met at another baby shower. Except this time we weren't the pregnant ones. Hallelujah.
Although we were missing two others, we grabbed a snapshot of us and our babies. We all did it! We survived the nine months of pregnancy and had adorable children.
Last year at this time I was nine months pregnant and feeling oh-so-ready to have a baby. I was waking up every few hours at night to pee, sleeping uncomfortably with a pillow propped beneath both back and belly, and having Braxton Hicks contractions weekly. Not to mention the swollen feet and ankles I was getting from my twelve hour night-shifts in the ER.
And did I mention the envy I had for any woman who had recently given birth? Major jealousy...
But I wasn't the only one expecting. The ER was full of pregnant women. I was the furthest along, then the others followed close behind. A year ago this month we had a baby shower to celebrate.
And today, a year later, we met at another baby shower. Except this time we weren't the pregnant ones. Hallelujah.
(LtoR) Athena & Nayeli, Kattie & Zara, Heather & Easton, Nesha & Finn)
So was it worth every middle-of-the-night trip to the bathroom? You'd better believe it. And I'm sure the other girls would agree.
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