More on Fashion Sense: The Episode of the Boots

A while ago I posted our family pictures on this blog and Facebook and I had three people comment on the boots I was wearing. Why? Well, those boots are rather famous. It's been two years since they redefined my marriage with Ben and they are still an icon. Allow me to tell the tale.

Once upon a time Ben and I were more newlywed than we are now. We were in a budding relationship, discovering each other and learning about marriage. And then one day... Ben discovered something about me that he wished he hadn't.

We were about to go to Washington DC for Ben's internship. In fact, we had been invited to a party with all the other students we'd be living with. Being the mild-fashionista that I am, I wanted to buy something new for the party. The recent style of skinny jeans with knee-high boots had really caught my eye. What a perfect way for someone with short legs (like me) to look tall and lean! It was just the look I had been waiting years to catch on!

So I went to the mall and bought the cutest pair of skinny jeans and knee-high boots I could find. And I only spent $55. I was so proud of my bargains that I couldn't wait to come home and show my husband. I wish I hadn't.

As soon as I put the jeans and boots, Ben looked at me with disbelief.

"What?" I asked. "Don't you like them?"

"You look like all the dumb girls on campus".

I was shocked. Ben had never said anything like that to me. So I retaliated.

"Well I like it. Besides, I didn't marry you so you could tell me what to wear".

Ben was shocked. I had never said anything like that to him either.

And thus began the battle. While our typical arguments usually resolved within the hour, this one festered. And wouldn't go away.

It was two full days of tears, harsh words, and nights on the couch (not really, but with the cold shoulder Ben got in bed he might as well been sleeping on the couch). And then I decided to go to my parent's and discuss the matter with them. I was sure they would take my side.

But they didn't. They took Ben's. My mom suggested I return the boots saying, "Those boots aren't worth your marriage". At the time I felt betrayed, but I can now see that my parents were teaching me an important lesson. They were letting me know that if I came crying to them, they weren't going to provide me refuge. They wanted to get the message across early on that I needed to solve my marital problems within my marriage. 

Ben's mom Jane did the same. After discussing the matter over, she suggested Ben show me he was sorry by having me wear the boots while taking me out to dinner. In typical Ben humor he asked, "Could I just take her through the drive-through?" Ha ha.

Eventually it got sorted out, we forgave each other, and I now own three pairs of knee-high boots. In fact, for Christmas I even bought myself a pair of neon-pink skinny jeans and Ben didn't even flinch. He has come a long way.

Besides, it serves us well to have at least one of us keep our fashion sense up to date. And with Ben as an unlikely candidate, I gladly step in. They may be tough boots... I mean shoes... to fill, but somebody has to do it.

The boots with us at the Bureau of Engraving and Printing in Washington DC.

At a lunch with friends. Please notice that 50% of these girls are wearing knee-high boots (and one calf height! Which is almost the same thing).

Ben's Fashion Sense

Ben has never been into fashion. Take these two recent examples.

EXHIBIT A

Athena: Ben, we need to get you new sweaters.
Ben: Why? All my sweaters are fine.

Athena (trying to be tactful): Well... a lot of your sweaters are worn or out of style.

Ben: No they're not.

Athena pulls out the sweaters and lays them on the bed. She points to one.

Athena: When did you get this one?  
Ben: In high school.
Athena: And this one?
Ben: In high school.
Athena: And this one?
Ben: Well that was Daniel's, then Sammy's, and then I got it. I was probably in high school.

EXHIBIT B

Ben, driving, sees a man dressed very trendy aka metro walking across the road.

Ben: That guy looks ridiculous! Does he know how ridiculous he looks?!
Athena: No, I'm sure he thinks he looks really cool.

Ben pauses, pondering.
 
Ben: I guess we all look ridiculous sometimes.

Athena sighs, relieved Ben has seen a more reasonable viewpoint.
Ben continues to ponder...

Ben: But when I look ridiculous it doesn't take me any time or effort at all. I just put on whatever and go. That guy has to plan to look that way. I'm sure it takes me half the time that it takes that guy to look ridiculous. 

Now you know why I never tire of this play we call life. The same way Ben never tires of his high school sweaters.

3 Sets of Clothes

Athena is at work tonight. This means I'm at home waiting for 11:00 when I can go to bed and wait for her to snuggle up to me at 5:30 a.m. Sometimes she is an emotional wreck when she gets home. Working in the E.R. is not a teddy bear's picnic for either party, no ma'am. Imagine me, the unsuspecting, sleeping husband trying to deal with an emotional, tired wife at 5:30 a.m. Sometimes it looks more like a grizzly bear's picnic. Needless to say, we love each other and the E.R. sometimes requires that we be patient with each other-- that or stockpile bear mace. However, I'll make the E.R. a post for another day--say--next year sometime when I post again. I feel like blogging is mostly a woman's sport, but I don't mind dabbling in this neck of the woods from time to time. I just need to remember to beat sticks against the trees to avoid any sort of unwanted encounters with the native wildlife. That said, I wander into this unknown forest of blogger bears, with the nearly concrete assumption that my audience is nearly almost, if not completely and entirely, female. Hence, I address what I feel to be a personal male flaw, in hopes to gain insight and understanding. Your comments and suggestions are welcome and encouraged.

My topic of discussion today is clothing. Perhaps my inspiration comes from a friend's blog www.xothelookbook.com. She was in the broadcast journalism program with me and was always impeccably dressed. I suppose this qualifies her to write a blog dedicated to the art of dressing well. The other inspiration for this post comes from a recent perusal of the "Petersen Palooza Blog." I realized after looking at the many pictures that Athena has posted, that it appears that I have/wear approximately three sets of clothes. Funny thing is, that's about accurate. Clothes really aren't my thing. If one were to examine the clothing that is currently in my closet and the clothing that was in my closet, say, seven years ago, there are few disparities between the two; yes, they are nearly identical. The fact of the matter is, I have been wearing the same clothes for a long time. Assuming I don't get typhoid fever and lose a bunch of weight, I will probably be wearing the same clothes until they fall apart or until my children steal them because the styles from the early part of this millennium have finally come back in vogue.


You see, I just don't worry too much about clothes. I have my favorite pair of shorts from the DI, my brother's pants that fit just right, a couple shirts that fit like a dream, and my beloved blue jacket that I picked up at a BYU lost and found sale. I watch styles float past my island of fashion disregard and I don't seem to mind. If my old clothes make me happy, why would I spend money on new ones? And if I did spend money on new clothes, what would I buy? Where would I buy it? What if I ended up hating my new wardrobe? The uncertainty of the entire endeavor is enough to discourage this fashion flop from even driving past a mall with thoughts of stopping.

My alternative to fashion and purchasing new clothing is simple: marriage. By marrying a style savvy woman, I have effectively evaded all malls and shopping trips, as well as the difficult decisions made in department stores. New clothing simply appears. Imagine that! Indeed, marrying Athena has brought previously unprecedented feng shui and renewed chi to my side of the closet. I declare in solemn solemnity that I have approximately two new items of clothing in my wardrobe-- a 200% increase over the last fiscal year. Yes, this whole marriage thing could change the entire face of the faded t-shirt section in the closet. It could mean I return my brother's sweaters so expertly pilfered after my mission. It could ring in a new era of style and suave debonair delight. It could mean my secret affinity for finding sweet old clothes at the DI is over. It could mean there will be more variety and style in the clothing I wear in the pictures on our blog. It could mean I lose my favorite belt that has served me since 8th grade or the t-shirt from my junior year of high school. Yes, this is serious business. While I know my old clothes won't last forever, I'm not sure what the future holds for my wardrobe. Perhaps I'll start wearing camouflage in order to sneak up on the styles before they sneak up on me. I've heard overalls never go out of style-- maybe therein lies my fashion future. The only thing I know is that my favorite pair of pants is starting to wear at the knee and Athena keeps suggesting we buy me some new clothes. Does that mean she wants me to go shopping with her? Do I make a go at it alone? The trepidation has me petrified. For now, I'll just keep wearing my faded clothes and hope overalls go on sale soon. The front pockets on those puppies would sure be nice for storing loose change and bear mace.
Ben